On the question of social media

I find this whole posting/blogging/insta-awesomeing/fb'ing thing harder than even I could have imagined. Not hard in the technical sense - I get it. Take the picture, write the words, upload - which makes the slowness I have within that realm even more profound. I like to know myself as  an articulate person and so my resistance to having that articulation take any concrete sharable form is about something I don't want to see. It's as if the ease and pervasiveness of these tools are inviting me to see something that is hard within me. Maybe it's a self confidence thing - it feels easy to fall back into fear of success/fear of failure types of binaries but that feels super surface. I really admire those that can navigate within this digital realm and move people into spaces of deeper thought or action. To speak beyond your circle of people and reach out into the unknown and see who finds you. Maybe it's just frightening to be vulnerable in that way. To put on a blindfold and speak from your heart and not know what and who will find you. There is so much I learn when directly in contact with another. Visual cues and ones from my heart. This face, the one of electronic presentation feels like a dense mask. I guess I hope that now, as I work to inhabit it with greater frequency and openness, that I can do my truth justice by finding a way to represent the challenges through which I am working and not just a portrait of what is done.